Love or Lust

"I love you like I have never loved anyone else."

I have heard this or something similar to it throughout the MoHo world many times. Could it be because you are finally attracted to someone or that you connect with them on a deeper level than you have ever connected with anyone before? The answer is YES!!!!

The danger of all of this is the fact that this so-called "love" is most likely not love at all. It is lust. I have seen, heard, and talked to many MoHos that have fallen in "love" in a week or a couple of days. These MoHos usually tell each other that they love one another and then it moves quickly. It starts with snuggling and cuddling. Then it can move on to rubbing and touching. Then they start to kiss and sleep with one another. This then allows for very compromising situations and it usually ends up with the "lovers" doing things that will cause them to have to talk to their prospective bishops. All of this can happen in a matter of days or weeks and in my opinion, this NOT love, but rather lust!

I am going to compare this type of relationship with the relationship of Jamie and Landon in the movie, A Walk to Remember. For those of you who have not seen this movie, it is a definite must because it shows true love perfectly. In A Walk to Remember, Landon and Jamie start out to have absolutely nothing in common and they come from completely different worlds. Landon cares about looking cool and his reputation while Jamie cares about who she is and she does not care what others think of her. After a series of events, Landon ends up spending a lot of time with Jamie. They soon start getting close and they become really good friends. Then Landon does some stupid things that hurts Jamie. He soon realizes that he is hurting because he has hurt her. Landon wants do anything to make her feel better. They soon mend their relationship and start to date. Landon is so sweet. He helps her accomplish some of her life goals and he protects her from the rest of the student body who makes fun of her constantly. He no longer cares about his reputation. He only cares about her and her happiness. Jamie decides to tell Landon that she has leukemia. Landon could have cut and run, but he did not. He stays with her to the end and actually marries her.

They have a perfect love for each other and it is definitely not lust. Their relationship is something more. It is not about sex, making out, and whatever else could happen between them. Those aspects are not even a big part in their relationship. It is about getting to know each other and making each other happy. It eventually becomes all about marriage and that is something that is a healthy step in any relationship that is about the perfect and pure love.

Then you also see the "older" (from Beck) MoHos and a recent "young" MoHo (Drex) get married. The "older" MoHos have a true love for their wives too. They would never do any "gay" actions to hurt their wife and ruin their marriage. Drex and Salad are a good example of people our age finding true love. I see how much they love each other, how they support each other, and how they try not to do anything to hurt one another. These are more examples of true love. Just talk to any of them and you can see the pure love that they have for each other.

There are also straight Mormon couples in our lives who are true and faithful to one another. They go through their dating and engagement periods without doing anything. They make it to the temple and they get married. Then they are allowed to perform the sacred action of procreation together. If a straight Mormon couple was having sex or doing any sort of promiscuous things before marriage, they would not go to the temple. This is definitely not true love for one another if they are Mormon. They are most likely lusting after each other. My guess that a lot of us would be disgusted with this, so why should we have a double standard when it comes to us?

I know a lot of MoHos who look down upon those who only get married because of looks and the desire for sex. Then they go off and do their own things. This can get them in trouble with the church, but they do not seem to care. This is very hypocritical, in my opinion. You should hold the same standards that you hold for others. Just because you deal with same-sex attraction does not mean that you have different standards. You need to find true love instead of lust too!

I personally do not hold any bad feelings to any of you that choose another path than the church. I suggest that you find a true and pure love like Jamie and Landon, the MoHos that have gotten married, and the straight couples who do not do anything until they are married have. If you lust after another guy, do things that are not up to church standards, and then want to get back in the church again, I can truthfully say that it is a hard road back. If you truly love someone you would try to do everything in your power to NEVER hurt them (this in my opinion is doing things that can hurt their standards in the church and pushing them away from the teachings of the church)! Think about what you are doing and think about your "love" for this other person. Take it slow and see if it is really what you both want. Do not rush into your lust for one another and be careful not to become MoHo whores or I guess MoHoHos (thanks Drex).

This does not change my feelings on the relaxed state of the MoHo world. I know a lot of you personally and I know that a lot of you want to stay true to the church. Why stay in this relaxed state and hurt your chance for salvation? Things need to change. I am fine with snuggling and what not, but NCMOs and other actions that go too far are not good because they lead to feelings for one another and then into these lust relationships and then MoHoHos. Be careful and think about what you are doing.

Do not do anything that would ever hurt the one that you "love!"

Note: I made a few changes in the blog thanks to McKenzie. I would just like to apologize for saying that those who are promiscuous before marriage do not have true love for each other. I think that this is only true if they are Mormon because they are working on a Celestial marriage and premarital relations are not allowed (they cause damage and are not good). In writing this blog I was thinking only about Mormons and not others so if I offended anyone, including you McKenzie, I am sorry. I hope that you can forgive me.