The Italian Stallion

I am so mad right now! This weekend was my birthday and everything was a hot mess until The Italian Stallion decided to be an utter douche bag. I need to give some background of The Italian Stallion so you all can understand why he's a douche bag and no longer my friend.

The Italian Stallion (further called TIS from here on out) is a colleague at work. He was one of my first straight friends in Frederick. TIS was very nice and welcoming. He starting inviting me to bars with him and other colleagues, and we quickly became close. Eventually, TIS started talking about sex with women, picking up on chicks, etc. I always came up with an excuse or just changed the topic. I asked another colleague who already knew that I am gay about coming out to her and the rest of her lab. She said that should be perfectly fine. I did that and TIS seemed to be ok with everything. Quickly, our friendship changed. He was no longer inviting me to events and texting me. Then he started avoid conversations with me. It became interesting, but I decided not to care because I have made other friends. Jump forward to this weekend.

I invited his lab to go out with me to celebrate my birthday. A couple of them wanted to go to a gay bar and club to experience it. He told me that he was going to Delaware this weekend and couldn't make it. I gave him the benefit of the doubt and believed he was actually going to go to Delaware. Well, last night I come to find out that he did not go to Delaware and stayed home this whole weekend. Again, I decided not to care because I don't consider him a close friend anymore. Then he started texting one of the male colleagues during the evening. He was asking about the gay people hitting on my colleague, how weird it was, etc. That started to bother me. I didn't let it get to me and ruin my night though. Then this morning he texted a couple of my male colleagues asking them if they were ass raped last night and received HIV from it, because all gay men have HIV. That seriously irritated me. What kind of naive, conservative douche bag is he? It makes me wonder what he thinks of me. I'm guessing he thinks I'm a whore who has HIV and who is spreading it around to all of the heterosexuals. UGH! I want him to say something to my face so that I could confront him. I have A LOT I want to say to him.

As I have been talking to my colleagues, we have all decided that TIS is a closet gay. He is very homophobic, hypermasculine, insecure, touchy-feely (he touches everyone but me whenever they walk by him), never has had a girlfriend, and other markers. Also, TIS will not make eye contact with me for fear of catching the gay, but I catch him staring at me all the time when I'm not looking at him.

My question is what do I do? Should I just confront him about everything that is bothering me or should I just let it go? I'm not one to take crap from people, but I don't want to mess up work dynamics and have people start hating him and me. Also, if he is truly gay, I don't want to force him out of the closet when I feel like he is so very deep in it. Sigh... I wish there was an easy way out of this one.

Finals = Annoying People

So it is finals week and everybody has decided to take over my beloved study grounds. UGH! I hate them. They drive me insane and are absolutely annoying. They take my favorite spots to study. They bring big groups of people who talk really loud in no talking zones--I don't mind them being there, but it's when they talk that puts me over the top. They take all of the computers. They bother you when you are trying to concentrate. UGH! Just shut up and leave me and my study areas alone! Please! I'm just trying to do well on my finals and study for the MCAT.

PS I totally rocked my Physiology final today--a 97%! Finals started off on a good foot! :)

I Hate The Fight for Marriage

I am personally getting so sick of all of the fighting over the definition of marriage and Proposition 8. I hate hearing people on campus talking about. I hate getting emails about how I should support both sides. I hate hearing people bash on each other. I hate how the Church is handling the situation. I hate how a lot of MoHos (and the gay community) are handling the situation. I hate getting facebook invites telling me to "say no" or "say yes." I hate getting into fights with friends about the topic. I hate seeing my friends and family talk about the issue and fight over it because they differ on opinions. I hate how much contention this is causing.

Why can't we all just be friends and be ourselves? Why can't everybody have the same rights? Isn't that what America is about, equal rights for all?

These questions open up a huge discussion on the topic, but I don't want to get involved with it anymore. I am sick of it! I want it to be over and I want to hear nothing about it again. I wish it would all go away.

A Ranting Vacation

I would like to thank all of you who read my blog and especially those who comment. I love all of you, despite my lack of knowing some of you. I just wanted to tell everyone that I am going to be taking a break. I am perfectly fine, but I just do not have the time and effort to write posts.

Here is a little rant for y'all. I have only really been writing depressing posts because those are the ones I need to get out and off my chest. My life is mostly great and I love it a lot. There are just some hard times. One thing that really bothers me is when people comment or email that I should think about going on pills. Personally, I do not think pills will help me. Sure I have ups and downs, but it is a natural part of life. I am not depressed all the time! My counselor has told me that I am perfectly fine psychologically and that I am just a normal person. So please quit telling me that I need pills!

That is all. I am done for awhile and I hope that when I get back you will read my blog again.